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I don’t speak your language, and for that I’m sorry, and I do appreciate that you’re trying to speak to me in English. The menu looks good, I’m absolutely starving, I’m going to order exactly what I’ve been craving and it’s going to be amazing. Ok miss, I’m ready to order….

Waiter taking an order
Take a look at this Miss Waitress - A pen, some paper... amazing eh?!

She comes to my table, my friends and I order whatever we want, it’s going to taste so good, but it’s quite a big order. Maybe you should write the order down maam? No, you’re going to remember it all are you? What – all of it? Really? And no mushrooms with mine, but extra cheese with his, oh and a iced coffee, no sugar. Have you got all that? You sure you don’t wanna scribble it down? Ok, up to you.


30 minutes later, my stomach is stating to eat itself. ‘Our’ food comes. I shouldn’t really say ‘our food’ as it doesn’t resemble anything like what I ordered, in fact not one dish is correct. I tell her, she giggles, I want to reorder but I can’t face waiting another 30 minutes. I eat it, it’s not what I want but it’s food. Pay and leave.


Waiters of the world (excluding Europe, ANZ and N.America!), listen up. The pen wasn’t invented to scratch an itchy point on our lower back, please for the love of God, write this stuff down. Get it right, you must makes mistakes all day every day – can’t you see that!? WRITE IT DOWN. It’ll take 10 seconds and every order will be right from now on, imagine that. People actually getting what they ordered, what an amazing concept! I’m fed up with getting the wrong food from Ethiopia to Egypt to East bloody Timor. Write it down, it’s that effing simple. Thanks for listening. Grrrrrr….

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7 thoughts on “Tuesday’s Travel Rant: Ordering Food

  1. This is pretty funny and so true…Although its funnier when you’re not starving and waiting for food. I like the places that have the picture menu, I just point and say yea, that’s it. And of course there are the times you order whats supposed to be an appetizer but they just bring it all out together anyway. SO you’ve been starving and then you have to eat it all at once, which of course leaves you full immediately since your stomach already at some of itself and now you’ve got to force it all down because you did order it and you hate wasting food!

  2. I’m with you. I hate it when they say they’ll remember your order, because 50% of the time, they don’t. I think there’s a perception that if they’re really good at their jobs, they shouldn’t have to write things down, but IMO, everyone should write it down.

  3. LOL, good post man. That’s another reason to love Japan. Even if the menu is not in English and the staff do not speak English, most restaurants will have all the food items on display and you can simply walk to the display and point to what you want. It’s great! The items are literally a work of art too. You’d think you were looking at the real food that is on display. And I guarantee you that when you receive your order, it looks exactly like it was displayed.

  4. Why are you excluding North America & Europe? I had some experiences in Europe where I’ve gotten the wrong order because the waiter heard different from what I’ve said thinking he was too good that he’ll catch all the things we said.

    I think it boils down to language barrier mostly and natural rudeness of waiters – but this issue is global mate!

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